Meaning and Connections to the Inner World

Thursday, August 23rd, 2012

An ongoing topic that comes up frequently in psychotherapy and psychoanalysis is, “What is the meaning of life? Or – even more importantly – how do I find meaning?” Through his experience living in a concentration camp during Nazi Germany, the existential psychologist Victor Frankel discovered that a sense of meaning gave people a sense of hope and was the main factor in whether or not they had the will to live. If we feel connected in our inner world, we have a much greater tolerance of adversity in the outer world. The question becomes, “What is meaningful and how do we find it?” Meaning is something we embody – it is not someone else’s algorithm that we can conveniently plug into. For most of the people who come to see me, adopting someone else’s religion doesn’t work.

Meaning is an emotional state linked to an inner “knowing.” It is the actual experience of connecting to something bigger than we are, or a sense of feeling at home or well-being. For others, it is passion that brings purpose and commitment to something greater. Meaning also comes about through feeling altruism and gratitude, with a desire of giving back. Meaning can be a connection with either the inner or outer world, depending on personality preference and tendency toward introversion or extroversion.

Meaning is frequently experienced as a “felt sense.” Cognitive understanding does not bring meaning although it may be a way of describing it. Meaning is first experienced in the heart and body. Clients have asked me, “So then how do I find meaning?” It is my understanding that finding meaning is often about cultivating a receptive attitude.
In the bimonthly women’s group that I facilitate, recently I have been observing an emerging phenomenon. Some of the women, returning from summer travel have announced that they plan to move to where they have just come back from – in a search for meaning. Is it necessary to step outside of our life to reset in our inner world? Do we need a different vantage point when we feel stuck? Maybe – but not necessarily. Sometimes it is easier for us to get caught in reifying or concretizing experience and harder to bring the spirit of the energy back and integrate it into our daily lives – or as shamans say, “Grow corn with it.”

When we are in the afterglow of an experience, it is important to treat the experience as sacred rather than trying to force symbolic interpretation. The afterglow must be kept alive, cooked, and nurtured. By waiting for the experience to coagulate in our psyches we offer it the opportunity to develop organically and grow as it needs to. Living in Western culture often requires toggling between two worlds – the practically of the day world with the realm of dreams and vision. Ideally the visionary world will begin to inform the day world, giving it life and color – and meaning. The hardest part of this process is sitting with it and giving it time. This is how we claim it and make it a part of who we are.

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